I must have been a VERY bad Quaker this year, because Santa brought me the world's best Bad Quaker present.  The Jeeves Clock.  It not only provides all the normal clock functions it wakes you with a recording by Steven Fry. (Jeeves MPT)
150 different recordings to be specific.  An example

(birdsong) Ahem (quiet polite cough) Excuse me Madame, I am afraid it is morning again, quite inconvenient I agree, but it has something to do with the Earth's rotation, and cannot be stopped I am told.

And it is gender Binary! you have to buy a whole different clock if you want "Sir' to be awakened rather than "Madame"  It is fabulously classist - who has't always wanted to be gently awakened by a man servant.  It provdes temptation to grandiosity, and pride. He flatters and cajoles to get you to rise. I am sure that he prevaricates. And sloth - OMG - the snooze button puts the next alarm off for a FULL HOUR.

Great Fun

And then it got spooky.

This morning's greeting - and I quote precisely

" Good Morning, Madame,  blah, blah, blah french blah (ok not so precise)  -  'If only the young knew, or the old were able.'   We must not complain about getting older, as many do not have the option. "

Yes, this on my birthday. Jeeves knew.

I think this is going to change my whole attitude about mornings.


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